OK I need everyone's input

[Mez]

OK here is the deal. I will actually tell you the story after you respond, but I need your opinions to validate my own. Or to tear me down and make me doubt my own thoughts on the matter.........

What age is it OK for you to have your daughter's ears pierced (or think forward ten years to when you have kids) and what age would it be OK for a son? Is it sexist for it to be alright for a girl to get her ears pierced at a younger age and not a boy?

Kthx, Fire away!!!

[Ven]

Shouldn't matter either way though its a bit odd for a little boy to have his ears pierced.

[Nebulis]

Wait until they're at least in middle school

[Dharra]

I was 9 when I got my ears pierced. My brothers were never allowed too. My dad told them he would yank it out of their ears. He was very old fashioned.

[Lozzt One]

Personally i would say between 5th and 6th grade for a girl as i am not a girl and from the south thats just my observation of when most girls get them pierced..

Now for a boy in my own opinion should not ever think about getting his ears pierced... If he ever plays any kind of sport with contact he wont be able to play with them in plus i just think it makes a guy more of a girl since it is a feminin thing to do..


--- Just my opinion from a southern boy

Lozzt
22 Dwarf Priest of Archimonde
The Shipwrecked Pirates
Quote, "Its not the size of the ship its the motion of the ocean.... Well I know it takes a long time to get to England in a row boat.."

[Mutt]

Ever heard of new kids on the block? Yea they wore earrings.

[Batash]

I don't have kids, but I say let them have an earring or earrings if they want, regardless of sex. As for age I'd say it's more of when you feel they're responsible enough to care for the piercing and not let it get infected.

Gender identities are stupid imo, let kids be who they are. Why is the perception ok for a girl to dress up in jeans/t-shirt and play softball, but if a boy wants to wear earrings and bake cookies it's a big deal? Most girls who wear jeans/t-shirts aren't lesbians, and most guys who know how to bake aren't gay. Even if they are they'll probably be more miserable pretending to be something they're not.

If the boy can't wear a piercing for a sport he wants to play, it only takes a few seconds to remove the earring. And as I recall from high school, most of the jocks had some form of piercing or another.

As for me, my parents didn't care either way. They were more concerned with how I treated people. I got an ear pierced when I was 17 and let the hole close up when I was 20.

[Ven]

Gender identities maybe stupid, but they are there nonetheless. You should also remember that kids are ruthless mean-spirited bastards sometimes. I'm sure you wouldnt want your 10 year old boy coming home crying because some kid ignorantly called him a fag or some other such thing. You gotta be able to know whats good for your kid and allow/deny certain things even though they may not like it. Thats the trick of being a good parent. Hmm, i went way off base, oh well.

[Spawl]

Well, we went through this not too long ago. My daughter is going to be 4 years old and my wife was dead set on getting her ears pierced early so she got hers pierced just about 2 1/2. Personally, I think we should have waited, but in the grand scheme of things, it isn't that big of a deal.

Earrings are a way to express yourself, and I think it should be the child's decision on whether to get them done or not, given that they are old enough. I would set an age and make it a "right of passage" type thing, if I was to do it over that is.

As far as whether boy/girl goes, I'm pretty old fasioned about the whole thing.

[Mez]

Gender identities maybe stupid, but they are there nonetheless. You should also remember that kids are ruthless mean-spirited bastards sometimes. I'm sure you wouldnt want your 10 year old boy coming home crying because some kid ignorantly called him a fag or some other such thing.

Thats true Ven, but if one of those little shits wants to tease another kid, s/he will find SOMEthing to pick on, earring or no earring.

[Ven]

Exactly, but why give them something so easily identified? nawmean?

[Scintelle]

I'd say.... ummmmmmmmmmm.... four for a girl ;)

I'd probably encourage my son not to get an earring... but that's just me.

[Batash]

Exactly, but why give them something so easily identified? nawmean?

Yes, at that age some kids may use it as a route for teasing. And yes, at that age some will find anything to tease about.

But, would you rather have your son express himself the way he chooses, and learn how to deal with bullies? Or would you prefer your son to feel suppressed in his feelings to cater to a bully?

It's a cycle. If suppressed, he may feel the need to tease other kids to make himself feel better just like the bully.

[Kydorias]

For a girl I'd say around 4-6 years would be normal. I've known strict parents who wouldn't let their daughter pierce their ears until the teenage years, usually the daughter ends up just doing it anyway despite her parent's wishes. I've also seen baby girls with pierced ears, I thought that was very cute. But I know people who would be aghast at the idea of a baby having earrings.

So for a girl, I would back up whoever said whenever the girl was old enough to take care of herself and not get infected.

For a boy, I would totally leave it up to the boy. If you make the decision for him, he'll dislike it either way. Personally I'd try to convince him not to get one. Guys with earrings look gay to me. But I'm kind of conservative like that.

[Slak]

Comeing from a younger perspective than most people in this thread... it really does not matter what your child does at a in terms of piercings becuase things wont change all of the sudden.

If theres a bully theyd find something else, thats just the way it works.

But, it has to be their choice. If earrings are what your child's clique is into than it will be fine.

[Ven]

Yes, at that age some kids may use it as a route for teasing. And yes, at that age some will find anything to tease about.

But, would you rather have your son express himself the way he chooses, and learn how to deal with bullies? Or would you prefer your son to feel suppressed in his feelings to cater to a bully?

It's a cycle. If suppressed, he may feel the need to tease other kids to make himself feel better just like the bully.

I think there are more constructive ways to teach your children how to deal with intemperate people but i understand where you are coming from.

[Gnioss]

Hey my dad is one of those guys that would rip them out too, and I think they're kindof lame on guys, personally. When I imagine a kid with pierced ears I think MULLET AND SWEATPANTS.

allow me to illustrate

@@@<---mullet
(^_^)
-|-
/ \ <--sweatpants

[sema]

I don't think it's an age issue. If the parent and child both are comfortable with letting them pierce their ears then there is no need to hesitate.

Sure the kid can be bullied but if you want to live your life pleasing and being invisible just to avoid conflict you will slowly die inside.

When I was a kid there were several boys who had pierced ears and I can't remember any of them being bullied for it.

Only dead fish follow the stream...

[Zingmaster]

My wife got her ears pierced when she was two, and she hates wearing earrings. She never wears them now, but the holes have never closed up. Her mother made her get them pierced because she wanted this adorable little baby, and Bonnie has always resented her for it.

I would say for a girl, as soon as she is cognizant of what is actually happening, and wants them. That way she will never have a reason to complain about it.

My son is 6 and if he were to ask for an earring anytime within the next 7 years I would flat out tell him no. After that, I'd sit down and talk to him about all the things associated with boys and earrings, but if he still wanted one after all that, I'd have him think on it for a few weeks and then let him pierce his ear if he still wanted to.

I wanted to get my ear pierced for like a week when I was 14, and to this day I am so unbelievably happy that I didn't. On the other hand, I don't think that wearing an earring makes a man any less manly, or more effeminate, and some guys can pull it off fairly well.

[Cinnabar]

Why is the issue of a boy getting a piercing even an issue? Most schools won't let them wear them anyways. Even in high school they weren't allowed to have them, at least here.

[Roxie]

I got mine peirced when I was FOUR MONTHS OLD. I don't remember any of it. ^_^
I rarely wear earrings, too! I mean, maybe like 1 time a year, or so. They've never closed up either.

But, I dunno. I'd say, "GO ASK YOUR DAD" lawl

[Cinnabar]

Mez, are you asking because you finally old enough to get yours pierced? :smile_ok:

[Diraker]

For girls I'd say about after 6 or 7 years old would be an ok time to consider getting their ears pierced, but only if it's something they want to do.

For a boy after 14-16 years would be an ok time, again but only if it's something he'd want.

And no, it's not sexist to think a boy shouldn't get pierced ear(s) until he's older.

These are just answers that would be for my personal situation and my personal situation only. Others, depending on their own situation and circumstances might have different ideas. I just would not want to be judgemental on an issue like this, unless it involves forcing or coersing children to do things they do not want.

[Zingmaster]

Cin I don't know a school in Iowa that bans earrings for males and not for females, as in there is no banning of earrings here. They cannot be worn during any sporting event, no jewelry can, including watches and necklaces.

[Nebulis]

I guess Iowa and NJ think alike

[Cinnabar]

Cin I don't know a school in Iowa that bans earrings for males and not for females, as in there is no banning of earrings here. They cannot be worn during any sporting event, no jewelry can, including watches and necklaces.

At my first high school here in Houston they allowed for females to wear one earing in each ear and males to wear none. At my second high school in another part of Texas it was allowed for both to have one in each.

[sema]

At my first high school here in Houston they allowed for females to wear one earing in each ear and males to wear none. At my second high school in another part of Texas it was allowed for both to have one in each.

Hahah that's ridiculous.

[Zingmaster]

Might as well make all the girls wear skirts and make them crouch down every morning and use a ruler to see whose is too short.

[Scintelle]

I volunteer to be the measurer.

[sema]

You know, its starting to sound like the old commie regimes where they forced everyone to have the same haircut. They even forced the men to wear pants with wide leggings...

[Mez]

Notice any commie rules were coming from Cinn's high school in the state of....Texas.

I'll give y' all the low down on the piercing situation when I am not about ready to die of the "too many tasks, not enough time at work" disease.

[Mez]

Alrighty, so my daughter just turned 4 and she has wanted to get her ears pierced so we took her down on her birthday and got them pierced. She was so excited and she looks really cute and its great.

The problem started when her older brother (her dad has a son who will be 10 soon) saw and thought it was so unfair because he has wanted to get his ear pierced for awhile and Emma's dad said that he wasn't old enough, and that there is a difference between a girl and a boy getting their ears pierced. The son's mother said its sexist and that there is no difference. So we all have different opinions. In the end the boy got very upset and is getting his ear pierced anyway. At this point, the dad doesn't want him to be mad or think he is favoring our daughter, so he is OK with it. The mom of the 10 year old was mad because she thought he was favoring Emma. We tried to explain that there IS a difference, but she isn't convinced. Personally, I don't think its SUCH a huge deal for a boy, but if he were my son I wouldn't let him until he is at least in junior high.

OH well, shit happens and people think differently and thats part of the beauty of having our own opinions. :) The moral of this story is that split families have it tough sometimes and something faily straight forward can get so complicated. And use protection!!! LOL

[Gnioss]

hey mez, that's a tough break, sometimes in split situations like that people can get really upset over meaningless things like that. And that kid is probably pretty good at playing both ends against the middle by now ^_^.

[Riley]

It probably had very little to do with actual ear piercing.

[Cinnabar]

It probably had very little to do with actual ear piercing.

Agreed.

[Cinnabar]

This reminds me of the time that Roxie's little brother wanted a split p33n and she didn't think it was fair that he could at such a young age and she wasn't allowed.

[Roxie]

I was devestated

[Kydorias]

For some reason I can't wrap my brain around the parental relationships and the ages of the kids, but that might just be me.

The important thing is both the kids seem to be getting what they want and the ages seem appropriate enough so that they can make intelligent decisions regarding their choices.